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How to romance Sam Coe in Starfield

Time to lasso this cowboy's heart.

starfield sam coe
Image credit: Eurogamer/Bethesda

Romancing Sam Coe in Starfield can take a while, but once you manage to capture this cowboy's heart he will be loyal to you for as long as you travel the stars together.

Sam Coe is one of the four companions you can romance in Starfield, but it does take a bit of effort to get to the point where you can start a relationship with the former Freestar Ranger. Also, if you make a bad decision here and there, getting the Coe descendant to fall for you will be that much harder.

Without further ado, we're here to show you how to romance Sam Coe in Starfield, including his likes and dislikes, we even show you how to marry Sam Coe too.

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How to romance Sam Coe in Starfield

We go into more detail below, but here is a basic run down of how to romance Sam Coe in Starfield:

  1. Start the 'Empty Nest' mission to unlock Sam Coe as a companion.
  2. Keep Sam as your companion and make sure to do things/say things that he likes or agrees with.
  3. Flirt with Sam any chance you get.
  4. Become allies with Sam by raising his affinity.
  5. Complete his personal mission 'Matters of the Hart'.
  6. Choose the 'Romance' option when it appears after the quest above.
  7. Speak to Sam then go and get Cora's approval of the relationship.
  8. Speak to Sam again and choose the 'Commitment' option.
  9. Marry Sam Coe in Akila City.

The list above is just a basic run down of romancing Sam Coe, but you do need to put in a bit of effort to be able to gain his trust and steal his heart.

starfield sam coe romance i love you option
Image credit: Eurogamer/Bethesda

The biggest thing to remember is that performing actions that Sam doesn't like or hates will reduce your chances of him falling for you - so be careful when you're doing missions with him as your companion. If the will to do criminal acts is too strong to resist, dismiss Sam as a companion so he remains oblivious to your misdeeds.

Sam Coe likes and dislikes in Starfield

You need to raise your affinity with Sam Coe in order to enter a relationship with him, and the quickest way of doing this is to say things or perform actions that he likes or loves. To do this, he must be your currently equipped companion - otherwise it won't work.

When you perform an action he likes, his affinity with you will raise and a notification will appear in the top right corner of your screen letting you know how he felt about that particular action. You can also boost your chances of raising your affinity with him quickly by taking an aid item called 'Paramour' and by equipping the 'Leadership' skill.

starfield sam coe and character on mission looking at encrypted slate
Image credit: Eurogamer/Bethesda

On top of this, Sam will respond more to you and have more thoughts on events if you join and complete the Freestar Ranger missions, starting with 'Job Gone Wrong'. Being a former Freestar Ranger himself, he has strong feelings on them still.

Also, his daughter Cora Coe will accompany you while Sam is your companion and Sam will often talk to you about her. Being a compassionate person towards his discussions about parenting, as well as being kind to and about Cora herself will win you serious points with him.

starfield cora coe give book funds
Image credit: Eurogamer/Bethesda

Another thing to remember, and arguably the most important one, is that Sam Coe is a very moral person (based on his questionable past, he has strong feelings on right and wrong). Choosing to try to talk your way out of trouble or settle a dispute by discussing the issue before resorting to violence is a big plus point for him. Though, if violence is needed after discussions break down, he's not completely adverse to it.

Starfield brooding Sam Coe
Image credit: Eurogamer/Bethesda

On the other hand, if you resort to violence instantly or hurt innocent bystanders Sam will hate it. He will also dislike it if you perform any criminal acts such as theft or piracy, so if you're thinking of going on a pickpocketing spree, it's best to leave Sam behind.

How to marry Sam Coe in Starfield

Once you have raised your affinity with him enough, you can begin to take steps to further your relationship with him. A word of advice, Sam Coe's personal mission 'Matters of the Hart' will put you in the firing line a lot, so we recommend stocking up on weapons, aid, throwables and ammo before setting off.

Here's how to marry Sam Coe in Starfield:

  1. Raise Sam's affinity.
  2. Complete his personal mission 'Matters of the Hart'.
  3. Meet Sam in Akila City in the Cheynne System and tell him you love him.
  4. Speak to Sam again, then go and get Cora Coe's approval of your relationship.
  5. Speak to Sam again and choose the 'Commitment' option.
  6. Go to Akila City, speak to Sam's father Jacob Coe.
  7. Gather the wedding guests.
  8. Marry Sam Coe in the Coe Estate!

During the wedding ceremony, Sam (who turns out to be quite the suave and sweet ol' romantic) gives you his Freestar Ranger badge as a commitment gift. You can then display this wherever you want to, we chose our dream home on Nesoi.

starfield sam coe marriage vows
Image credit: Eurogamer/Bethesda

Now, you can stay married to Sam Coe and when you choose to sleep in your double bed you will wake up with an 'Emotional Security' XP boost.

Just because you're married doesn't mean you can suddenly become a master criminal and Sam be ok with it, he still upholds all of his beliefs, so you still need to be mindful of doing something he doesn't life if he's acting as your companion. If he's not around to witness anything however ... no harm, no foul right?

How to divorce Sam Coe in Starfield

To divorce Sam Coe in Starfield you need to speak with him and select the 'How do you feel about our marriage?' option when it appears. From then on, follow the conversational options and persist that you want things to end, then eventually choose the 'End Commitment' option to get divorced.

starfield end commitment sam coe
Image credit: Eurogamer/Bethesda

It seems like there won't be any second chances with Sam, especially as you've not only divorced him but you've also hurt his daughter too. He will be angry with you for a while, but give it a few days and it will wear off eventually. Then, he will still act as your companion if asked (once he calms down).

On the bright side, you can now pursue on of the other romance options in Starfield instead!

If you're interested in romancing other characters in Starfield, check out our guides on romancing Sarah Morgan and Andreja.

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Marie Pritchard avatar

Marie Pritchard

Guides Writer

When she isn't exploring Horizon Zero Dawn or dropping into Apex Legends, Marie can be found causing havoc around Los Santos.

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